Glen McNamee
Rubber Johnnies
Posted on Jan 9, 2005 in Life

Johnnies

Look what I found! I never could use those damn things, and that is the very reason that I’ve still have got a large amount of them, even if they are out of date.

I got them five years ago (just after Conor was Born) on my one and only trip to the clap clinic or the family planning clinic as they like to call it. A more appropriate name for it would have been the “not planning a family clinic” because they did two things at this clinic, gave away condoms, and do tests for women’s problem.

It was both an interesting and embarrassing experience, as I ran into three people I knew while I was visiting (which was in the space on ten minutes is really quite impressive). The first person I ran into was Dabba, apparently because the clinic gave away condoms it required door men to keep the kids away and Dabba was that doorman, he opened the door quite excellently. Inside I ran into two lasses I know, obviously they were there for the other reason, so I scooted over to the free Condoms lady, and she asks me which brand I want. I have no idea how to respond as earlier stated I never could use those damn things (still can’t) so she gives me all three brands, twelve of all three brands. So I take my thirty-six condoms and leave as fast as I can, never to return. As you can see from the number that still remains, I should never have bothered.

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